Pippa Middleton’s Arse

Aha! That got your attention, didn’t it? But, of course, this isn’t about Ms Middleton’s arse. I have no interest in that. I do have some interest in her £400,000 deal to write a book about planning the perfect party, though. I wouldn’t mind a bit of that!

Reports tell us that the proposed (unwritten) book was the subject of a bidding war, so it comes as no great surprise that the deal went as high as £400,00, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t a little depressing. The publishers obviously think they can shift enough copies of the book to justify it but . . . y’know.

The Telegraph tells us that Pippa is:

keen for the book to be released next year but is determined that she is not seen to be making money from her closeness to the royal family.Therefore the book is likely to be launched late next autumn, after the summer celebrations around the Queen’s Jubilee but in time for the Christmas market.’

Come on. Of course this is to do with her closeness to the royal family, so why not just be up front about it? I know that Pippa is a ‘writer’ because she edits the online newsletter on her parent’s website, I know she doesn’t want to use her status to sway marketing in her favour, and I know she intends to write the book herself but, still. If she was Jo Shmo who edited her parent’s newsletter she would still just be Jo Shmo. Let’s not kid ourselves, this is another celebrity book, isn’t it? Next Christmas it’ll be on the shelves beside Jeremy Clarkson, Jamie Oliver and all the others who bring out their Christmas gift books.

It isn’t that I mind her geting a great book deal – I hope, for her sake and for the sake of the publishers, that the book does well. I think what bothers me is the whole celebrity thing and the fact that we have to pretend it isn’t becasue she’s connected to the royals. And anyway, what is it that fascinates people so much about the lives of celebrities? I just don’t get it.

That’s all.

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8 thoughts on “Pippa Middleton’s Arse

  1. No, I don’t get it either Dan. In fact, generally speaking, I find celebreties less interesting than ‘ordinary folk’. I might find them interesting if I were to sit across a table in a pub and have a natter over with them over a beer, then maybe stop off for some chips… with scraps of course… but all the hype surrounding celebs just hacks me off. The people who soak it all up and can’t get enough of it hack me off too. Perhaps one of us should write a book called ‘Pippa Middleton’s Arse’ – maybe that would be a big seller.

  2. Abi – I love your idea although we’d probably have to change the name to Mippa Piddleton’s Arse instead. After all, it worked for Hairy Potter… And it would be perfect for the Christmas market.

    But celebrity books really pee-pee me off. For every one written by the sleb themselves, at least 50 are ghost-written and it makes the whole publishing game even MORE difficult for us lesser mortals.

    • There was a Barry Trotter, too wasn’t there? Yeah, Pippa Middleton’s Arse sounds like it could be one of those risqué picture books, like the one about ‘shut the f**k up and go to sleep’ or whatever it was. Could be one for you, Abi.

  3. Boy, oh boy! You guys sound a bit disgruntled. Hey, come on, have a little pity. It’s not easy being a celebrity. I should know, I’m a celebrity . . . sort of. I am a celebrity with my pup, Mulder. He follows me from room to room, hangs on every word I say, looks for me to constantly give him treats. I don’t have a minute’s rest from his eyes. Then there’s the money. Well, he doesn’t have any money, so I’m a bit lacking in that area. But if he had money then he’d give it to me and then I’d be a real celebrity. I wish he had money. I sure could use the money. Hmmm, how does one get to be a real celebrity, I wonder?
    Anyway, be kind. Have some sympathy for the celebrity set. They’re just people, too (only they have the money.) I sure could use the money.

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