Halloween, eh? I remember when halloween was just the 31st October. Just another day. You know, it was all fields round here back then. Now, though, it’s all ‘trick or treat’ this and ‘scary costumes’ that and before we know it Marks and Spencer isn’t selling ‘cheesey puffs’ any more, they’re selling ‘witches toes’. And jam donuts are filled with ‘vampire blood’ instead of plain ole jam, and the supermarket has a whole aisle dedicated to all things Halloweeny. There’s a wholsale taming of all things scary.
They’ll be doing Happy Halloween cards next.
Still, it’s all good fun really. I mean, we can send the children out to knock on people’s doors and beg for sweets – and then eat them ourselves. And we can scare them and not feel bad about it. We get to carve pumpkins – though why anyone would want to eat what comes out of one is a mystery to me. That’s a halloween fright right there – the stringy, stinky guts of a pumkin.
What else? Oh yeah, we get to watch horror films, although I always get a little nostalgic when it comes to horror films. They just don’t make them like they used to.
These modern upstarts just don’t have the gritty, vicious charm of the films of the late 70s and 80s. Back then it all seemed new and forbidden. Even the Prime Minister told us we couldn’t watch them. Remember Margaret Thatcher and the scandalous ‘video nasties’ that sullied the minds of the young?
So why not treat yourself to a bit of garish, old-school horror tonight? Why not slip one of these rancid gems into the Blu-Ray tonight? Or, better yet, drag out the old VHS, play with the ‘tracking’ and watch one on a scratchy tape:-
You won’t be disappointed by the cheesey 80’s acting (mustachioed men, anyone?), the over the top gore and the fantasticly non CGI effects. It was all prosthetic skin, fake blood, and rotting animal guts back then, you know.
Hmm, I wonder if I can persuade my wife to watch Evil Dead with me tonight. Oh, there I go getting all dewy-eyed again.